VDAY

Valentines’s Day, V-Day, Singles Appreciation Day (SAD), whatever people call it. I say it’s just another day. I can’t help but think there are a lot of days in the year in which it would be appropriate to shower the person you love with flowers and candy, get a nice meal, light some candles, etc. I don’t see what’s so special about this day. The way I see it, Valentine’s Day is good for two things: boosting the sales of certain specialty products and making single people feel like crap.

It’s kind of cruel, in my opinion. I’m sure that somewhere out there my mother is thinking about how unfortunate it is that I’m celebrating my 23rd consecutive, dateless, Valentine’s Day. Plus the name V-Day kind of implies something a little more destructive and sinister. But worry not, my mother, I am not cowering in singledom but rather enjoying an nice afternoon and evening with friends. I willfully choose to treat today like any other day, not feeling worthless or lonely. I say, don’t wait for a greeting card or jewelry company to tell you to appreciate the one you love; I think your relationships will be all the better for it. I realize I’m not the best person to give relationship advice, but it’s just a thought.

This past weekend was a tough one. I went to Ohio Saturday morning with my friends Sara Beth and Emmett to do some music at a church. The drive up was beautiful with snow covering much of the farmland that lies between Nashville and Southern Ohio. We sat up at the church and shortly before we play, Emmett’s wife, Wendy, called and said that she was in a lot of pain. She was currently five months pregnant and had been dealing with some intestinal pain for about the last week. We played and when Emmett talked to Wendy again, she had been taken to the hospital and informed that she needed to have an emergency C-section. As Emmett dealt with the news, we quickly realized we needed to get Emmett home.

Within minutes, Emmett and I had taken Sara Beth’s car and headed for home. The car ride was tense for a bit until Emmett received the news that Wendy and the baby had both come through the surgery and were doing fine. Conversation started up and the tension eased a bit.

Within a few hours, the snow we had admired on the way up quickly turned into a curse, refreezing and sticking to the roads. It wasn’t long before we had to get off the road and check into a relatively shady motel operated by a middle-easter man. Behind the counter sat a black and white photo of a woman with a bullet hole in her head; I didn’t have a lot of confidence in the place.

The next morning, we drove the rest of the way home with the pleasure of a new-fallen and beautiful snow. I left Emmett, went home for a shower and returned to Ohio to finish the weekend at the church and give Sara Beth a ride home. When we got out of bed the next morning, we had the news waiting that Emmett and Wendy had lost their baby.

I’m broken hearted for Emmett and his wife. I cannot imagine a loss like this as I have no way to relate, which is a hard thing to realize. You want to help people you care about but I am finding I have nothing to say to them. I guess presence is the important thing, the thing that people remember the most. I pray for Emmett and Wendy and if you read this, I hope you will too.

So everyone, have a good day, regardless what meaning we are told to apply to it. Life continues, with all its joys and pains, and that is the important thing to me. So on this Valentine’s Day, I’ll enjoy this dvd of 24 I’m currently watching, and I’ll have dinner with a friend, and nothing is going to make me feel any different, no matter what my TV says.